Long time, no see!

Hello everybody! It has been forever since I have been on here. I won’t attempt to catch you up on the past month, because we would be here for a long time. So let us just hit the highlights.

The kids are adjusting to each other very well. Maisey hasn’t quite figured out that, though she is the big sister, she isn’t that much bigger than the little guys. I caught her trying to change Lainey’s diaper the other day. For anyone that knows Lainey, you can imagine how well that went. *shakes head* But she loves her “baby Evie”; she feeds her, gives her toys, shares just about everything with her. Likewise, Ben is enjoying being a big brother. I don’t know that he knows what to do with “Mr. Charming and Handsome” sometimes, but they are getting along well, now that they have the cozy coupe races figured out. Evie has adjusted fabulously. Our little parahna eats anything and everything, though she has a love for Twizzlers. She is growing so big, and she has learned to hum “thank you” to everyone. She giggles constantly and likes to dance in her car-seat with the other kids.

Lainey has been a harder adjustment. She has her great moments and she has her sad moments. We are slowly figuring out what she needs, and as we find more and more things, she seems happier and happier. One thing is for sure: the kid is a fish! She loves anything with water: the pool, the bathtub, the sink, the toilet (if someone forgets to shut the door). Anywhere she can find water, she will take it. It warms my heart to see her splashing around, giggling and playing. I know that life with Lambie is going to be hard, but I look at her in those moments and I can’t imagine leaving her where she was. I can’t imagine my precious little Lainey growing up in a place where no one would take care enough to help her be happy. I know that it is going to be hard, but I also know that it will be worth it.

My favorite adjustment to watch has been Jasmine. Oh man, that kid is a goof! Instead of saying someone is happy or cranky, she calls them “happy pants” or “cranky pants”. She is learning more English everyday. She is comfortable enough now to joke, tease, and laugh with us. It is fun to watch her come out of her shell. She went to VBS this week at my parents’ church, where she stayed in class with Gracie. I was there doing music, and I was prepared to have to step in and help with her. I was useless. Mr. Tom was amazing during rec time, pushing her around in the grass, including her in all the games. All of the other teachers/helpers were super sweet about keeping her included in all the activities. And oh man, the music. Jasmine loves music and she loves dancing, so what better than silly VBS songs with actions to match? She had a blast!

I think my favorite part has been watching her learn that people here don’t care that she is in a wheelchair. I took her to my church with me, in part because I wanted to see how she would react to the band. (Boy, was she surprised when they played!) I was also interested in seeing how she would react to an entirely new group of people. I am so grateful to my church and how incredibly sweet they were with her. She was grinning and laughing the whole time. So many people came up and introduced themselves, asked her name and how she was doing, all without the slightest hesitation at her or her chair. It was so heartwarming to watch her relax as more and more people introduced themselves to her. It was like I could see the fear of people treating her different just melt away from her.

Siblings.

Sorry I haven’t written in a while, it has been a crazy week.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my siblings during this trip. I know that, to most people, my family seems slightly crazy. It is okay if you do, big families are not for everyone. I have had people ask me various questions throughout this trip, but it always comes back to the same question, “Why would you adopt kids that you know have shortened life spans?” I never really know how to react to that question. I mean, it is not like I want to outlive the majority of my siblings; that is definitely not the road I would have chosen. Sometimes I feels bad for the friends I keep, the guys I date, the man I will marry, because I have/will knowingly bring them into a world that will be painful. I have introduced them to 10 sweet souls, some of who will probably be taken home long before we are all ready to let them go. They know this full well, because they are part of my life, but sometimes I feel like I should apologize to them.

But I won’t apologize.

No amount of pain we might feel could make me apologize for my siblings. Every day I have with them is a blessing, one I try not to take for granted. This trip has really made me realize how important family is to an orphan. Being in the States, you only get part of the story. You think that you understand the stories that people bring back from across the ocean. Truth be told: you don’t. You can’t truly, deeply understand it until you see it for yourself. You can’t understand how much family means to a child until you see tears rolling down faces pressed to a barred window as you leave the orphanage, their hearts breaking because they crave the love a friend was lucky enough to receive. You can’t understand how much a child needs love until you watch the process from withdrawn to carefree unfold before your eyes. I think that most adoptive families would agree: hearing and experiencing are two completely different ball games.

Once I saw them, experienced their life, I realized how amazing it is that we have been able to get my siblings out of here and into our home. I can’t even think about what their lives would have been like here. My heart hurts when I see people begging, because I know that is where my Shuang would have been. I saw toddlers confined to cribs because they were too delayed to be allowed to stand by themselves: that is where Lainey would have been. Evie probably would have been too, because she is too weak to even sit by herself. (Don’t worry, we are working on that. 🙂 ) This trip has made me realize that I am so blessed in so many ways, one of the biggest being the ones I get to call family; the siblings God has blessed me with. I don’t understand why He chose these disabilities for these children, or why He chose these children for us, all I know is that I am so grateful that He did. They have forever changed my life in ways I could never imagine.

Meet the newest little Ellsbury kids :)

Hello everyone! I’m sorry I didn’t get this up sooner, it has been a crazy past couple of days, and the internet doesn’t like to work in our rooms. But anyway, I have pictures!

Let’s start with miss Evie. She turned two in march and weighs in at a whopping 13.2 pounds. (note the sarcasm) She is almost too little for 12 month clothes and I had to buy her baby booties instead of shoes. Somehow, in all of that, she is full of personality. She’s got a grin that lights up her face, and she was the first of the babies to laugh out loud. She even intentionally kissed me on gotcha day, after I kissed her. As little as she is, she won’t take a bottle. The first night, I spent an hour spoon feeding her a cup of water. Eventually, we figured out that we can squirt a sippy of water/juice into her mouth and she will drink it, because she thinks it is hilarious. She loves banging things together to make noise, especially spoons. She has crazy long toes, and figured out yesterday that she can hold the spoons with her toes and clink them together. Leaves her hands free for food 🙂

I won her over with my hotel room key.

But daddy won her over with his ring. She is definitely a girl 😉

Then miss Lainey Rae, or as I call her Lu Lu. (It went from Lainey Rae, to Lainey Lu, to Lu Lu. She thinks it is quite funny). Lu Lu and Maisey are going to be trouble-makers together. Lainey is a much a monkey as Mei. She had a hard time at first; she wouldn’t make eye contact, didn’t want to be held. We were hoping it was just because she was upset. She went from New Hope back to the orphanage for two weeks before we got her. Her orphanage sucks, and I’m sure they weren’t nice with her, because of her playful attitude. But, after a couple hours, we found out how truly cuddly she is. 🙂

For some reason, Lainey loves sitting/ cuddling up on the top of the suitcase. She also climbed into mom’s pile of freshly folded clothes and made herself at home.

She even fell asleep on the suitcase. They did this weird thing where they cut all her hair, except for what you would put in a fountain, which was about 3 times as long as the rest of her hair.

But, jie jie saved the day and fixed it. Isn’t that better?

And here is mister Eli, the most handsome charmer in China. For whatever reason, they thought it wise to bring him in an awful flannel shirt and bright pink overalls, complete with bunny face and whiskers. His shoes were three sizes too small, and his poor toes were crammed in there. But man, kid is adorable! This is the only picture I have on my iPad right now, Ill put more up of him later. He has the scrunchy face, cheesy grin that seems to be a trait of Ellsbury children. 😉 He is taking longer to adjust than the girls, and he won’t take a bottle either. Spoon feedings all around. But he and I played ‘cooking’ while mama and baba were napping yesterday and got 8 bowls of water on us and the floor. He was having so much fun, he giggled. Giggling is a big deal in these first couple of days.

Today is the day….

I think we are experiencing the adoption-equivalent of labor pains. Mom had been up since 4:30 and she can’t sit still. 4.5 hours until we leave to get the babies. I will take lots of pictures so you all can see. 🙂

Also! Last night, we had gotten the babies board books with nursery rhyme type things, in Chinese. We got them at Wal-Mart, which was a whole other adventure in itself. I’ll have to post that later. Anyway, we handed the books to Shuang Shuang, because we thought she would Ike the pictures. We were watching her, and realized she was tracking, and looked like she was actually reading it. Mom went over and asked her what one of the characters was. She knew. She ended up reading the whole thing to mom, and then showing/telling mom what it means in English. I was so proud of my girl!

What happens when you lock four girls in a hotel room all day?

I fear we may have all gone crazy. Haha, not really, but we have had quite the silliness today. It has been just the four of us girls for a while today, and it has been a bucketful of giggles.

Shuang Shuang has been amazing today! While she ate dinner, she used the words: eat, drink, more please, help, and done. Then afterwards she asked to sit back on the bed. Her grasp of English, along with our couple phrases of Chinese and sign language, have resulted in quite the Ellsbury language. She even teased Mom today. We ordered her shrimp dumplings, and mom gave her a couple on her plate to start with. When she finished them, mom said, “Do you want more?” Shuang nodded. Mom asked, “One, two, or three?” Shuang grinned at her and said, “four, please.” My girl is catching on quick.

Speaking of my girl, I heard something I have been waiting months, but especially the past few days to hear: her laugh. When Shuang laughs, it is a silent laugh. She throws her head back and gets a big grin on her face. But today, I figured out where she is ticklish and finally heard her laugh. It started with tickling her feet, which got quite the grin. Then I was helping her put a clean shirt on, and found out she has very ticklish ribs. I was sitting behind her, and she laughed so hard she fell over into my lap. Like mom had said with Ben, her laugh was raspy, like she hadn’t used it in quite some time. But man, it melted my heart to hear her laugh.

Last post I shared Mema’s quote of the trip, now it’s time for Mom’s. 🙂 We were waiting for Shuang Shuang’s room service, and apparently mom had forgotten that we had ordered it to come at 6. We were waiting for dad to come back upstairs at the same time. When we heard a knock at the door, mom assumed it was dad. She bounced to the door, swung it open and said, “hey baby!” only to find a 6′ 5″ Frenchman where she thought my daddy would be. His face was priceless. His comeback? “You know, normally people just say, Ni Hao…. but I think this is the nicest greeting I have gotten all day.” My mother turned 37 shade of red while Mema and I sat in the corner, in tears because we were laughing so hard.

Adventure across China

Well, today was a raging mess of emotions. This post will be long, so I will apologize now. Sorry!
We travelled to Shuang Shuang’s former orphanage ( I love that word, ‘former orphanage’) which was in Liupanshui, Guizhou. There is a LWB Believe in Me School located there. It was a five hour van drive. each way, from our hotel in Giuyang to the orphanage. The van ride was full of giggles especially when we would dodge a car, resulting in a Star Trek lurch, knocking everybody into everybody else. The scenery is beautiful with all of the mountains. So different from Iowa. Mema and I spent the entire car ride trying to get one picture of the water buffalos they were using in the fields. We failed, haha.

Speaking of Mema, I have to share the best Mema story of the entire trip. There was a section of road that makes an Iowa B road feel like a merry-go-round. The mud and holes were insane. Anyway, the little place the road drove through was lined with glass store-fronts that had pictures of animals: chicken, catfish, rabbit, dog, among other things. We were discussing them on the way back, and I made a joke about the restaurants looking like pet stores. Mema admitted that she thought they were, and she couldn’t figure out why one little town needed so many pet stores. That certainly made our guide Bill laugh.

Once we got to the city, we spent probably a half an hour trying to find where we were going. Our driver, Mei, had the address of the orphanage on her gps, so we couldn’t figure out what was going on. Soon after, we found Jack ( a teacher at the orphanage) on his bike and we followed him. Turns out, the orphanage director and the teachers wanted to feed us a traditional meal in this area. There was so much food! Let me rephrase: there was so much spicy food! Oh my goodness. I’m pretty sure I couldn’t feel my mouth by the time I was done. Shuang Shuang kept laughing at mom because she couldn’t use the chopsticks very well. Luckily for me, Ben had taught me how to use them, so I managed.

After the meal, we went to the orphanage. In no way was my heart ready for that. We went in to the second floor, the baby floor. I could have stayed there for weeks. These little guys were just cuddled up in their cribs. Just laying there. We started talking to them, tickling and playing with them. For a minute, they had no idea what to do with us. Then they laughed. Oh, those laughs. And their faces. We have a lot of pictures that I will try to put up later. But believe me when I say, they are precious.

We went to the third floor to meet Shuang’s friends. They ranged from, I’d guess, 4 or 5 years old to 10 years old. They were all sitting quietly when we wheeled her in. They were so happy to see her, they hugged and kissed her. She knew everyone’s names, and was talking to all of them. These kids were adorable. My dad was using his iPhone’s reverse camera to show the kids themselves. Needless to say, those are some funny videos. There was one little guy who came over to me, yelled “Ni hao, jie jie!” (Hello, big sister!), hugged me and kissed my cheek. Quite a few of the kids called me jie jie. It melted my heart.

We also brought a suitcase of clothes specifically for the kids. You’d have thought it was Christmas in May, they were so excited. We had packed a variety of sizes in Shuang’s suitcase, because we weren’t sure how big she was. We had a pile of clothes that were too small for her, and she asked if we could take them to her two friends. When she gave them the bag, they looked like someone had handed them the keys to a new car. All over clothes. *shakes head* The things we take for granted…

Overall, we had fun getting to meet Shuang’s friends, see where she lived, meet her nannies. It wasn’t until I turned around on our way out, saw those little faces yelling good-bye, hands waving though the bars on the windows that it hit me: they aren’t leaving. For most of these kids, this is the only thing they will know until they age out. No family. No home. Now, don’t get me wrong, the nannies are trying their hardest to care for these kids, and for that they have earned my respect. But orphanage living, even with kind workers, pales in comparison to the love a mama and baba can give. I can’t get those faces out of my head. They just want to love and be loved. It is amazing how easily we take love for granted…

I love you!

Skyping with the family back home

Family, nannies, and teachers

Writing with the iPad